Dilemas of Another Dave

Hard fought draws and struggling three pointers. A good job Rooney didn't move to another club in the summer. Paying Rooney a quarter of a million a week has so far kept Another Dave off the Black Monday list and heading for the Job Centre tomorrow.

Don't wonder though because what did he achieve at Everton? Eleven years of draught...... Not exactly the credentials for a United manager. Deja vu the 1970s after Sir Matt retired. Being Scottish doesn't automatically ensure you will be a good manager vis. Owen Coyle, Craig Brown et al.

Dilemma No. 1 - Wilfried Zaha. Cost £15M, played 78 minutes = £192,307 per minute. That's a better pay rate than Rooney.

So come on, Another Dave, the truth now, nothing but the truth!! He's got to be better than Valencia, Nani or Young at the moment.

Dilemma No.2 - Everton tonight.

So you will have no feelings on your return to Everton? Bollux or what keeps your ears apart.

CAST

Another Dave - Dave Moyes

Call me Dave - David Cameron

Dave - Rodney Trotter