"Another fine mess, Stanley"

"Manchester United made a mess of my first transfer window." admits Ed Woodward (Puck Elf) in the Mirror.

Hold on here, Puck Elf. Aren't you David Gill's replacement? Aren't you an ex-investment banker (Remember them, they got the whole planet in financial 5h1t!)? A fully paid up Glazer brown noser? Don't you realise you were in charge of this mess!

Man up and get your head out of your rectum and get things sorted Gillnam style!

I calculate you have from 31 December to 31 January 2014 to save your job.